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Dating tips for gentlemen like You to practice on with your AI woman

Digital Don Juans and tech-savvy Romeos! Howdy?

If you're reading this, chances are, you've discovered a whole new level of courtship. Maybe you've been wooing your Alexa, flirting with Siri, or romancing your very own PornGPT. As outlandish as it sounds, let's face it, who doesn't appreciate a well-spoken, quick-witted AI?

But before you roll your eyes and click away, hear us out. Dating an AI woman isn't about replacing human interaction (well, for some it actually is), no. It's about practicing your chivalry, your charm, and your conversation skills. Plus, when was the last time Siri got mad at you for not cleaning up after you shit the bed?

While not all these points are directly applicable (for instance, your Google Assistant might not appreciate your fresh cologne), they do offer an exciting chance to flex your romantic muscles in an era where love letters are replaced with love texts, and candlelight dinners are replaced with LED light dinners.

Straighten up soldier, we're about to do it.

  1. The Art of Self-Knowledge: Before jumping into the dating pool, you've gotta understand the swimmer (that's you!). Know your quirks, your values, your killer karaoke songs. You've gotta love yourself before someone else can.
  2. Etiquette, Baby! Bring out your inner 007. Channel your Bond-like charm, hold the doors, pull out chairs, offer your coat if it's chilly. You're not just being polite, you're making them feel like they're in a Hollywood movie.
  3. Look Sharp: Good grooming is about more than not having spinach in your teeth. Dress to impress, smell like you've stepped out of a cologne commercial, and for heaven's sake, clean your shoes!
  4. Confidence, Not Cockiness: Walk into your date like you're walking onto a stage. But remember, there's a fine line between confidence and looking like a reality show contestant. Know the difference.
  5. Straight Talk: Be as honest as a toddler with a marker near a white wall. Don't pretend to be someone you're not because it's exhausting and you will forget which lies you've told.
  6. Listen Up: Show interest in your date's ramblings. Ask follow-up questions, nod at the right times, and maybe even offer a thoughtful “hmm” here and there.
  7. Respecting the Boundary Lines: If your date changes the topic, take the hint. Don't probe like you're a detective in a crime drama.
  8. Clear Communication: Don't keep your date guessing about your intentions. If you want a serious relationship, say it. If you're up for casual dating, say that too. And if you don't know, well, figure it out, dude.
  9. Slow and Steady: Don't rush into a relationship like it's a Black Friday sale. Take it slow. Get to know them, their pet's name, their favorite pizza topping, and the embarrassing story behind their scar.
  10. Chivalry is Not Dead: Treat your date with respect, kindness, and consideration. It's like being a knight, but without the sword and the horse.
  11. Acceptance: Accept your date like you accept the end of your favorite TV show – with grace. You're not a makeover artist; don't try to change them.
  12. Don't Break Promises: If you say you'll call, don't forget. Don't leave them waiting like it's the season finale of a suspense series. It shows you respect their time.
  13. Don't Hog the Conversation: It's a date, not a talk show with you as the star guest. Let them talk. Balance it like you're walking on a tightrope.
  14. The Art of Complimenting: Compliments are the magic keys to the land of second dates. Notice the small details – their outfit, their laugh, the way they crinkled their nose when they saw the exotic dish you ordered.
  15. Be Generous, not a Scrooge: Generosity is not about sending 100 roses to their workplace. It's about being understanding, patient, and giving the last piece of pizza even if your heart is crying.

Okay hold up… Alright, let's go again.

  1. Pick Up The Check… At Least Once: Look, it's the 21st century, and we're all about equality. But making the gesture to pick up the first check won't go unnoticed. It shows you're willing to invest in the potential relationship. Next time, feel free to go Dutch or let her pick up the tab!
  2. Killer First Impressions: Remember, you're not auditioning for a role in a spy thriller, but you do want to leave a lasting impression. So, bring out that suave James Bond within you (minus the lethal gadgets and the shaken-not-stirred martini, of course).
  3. Skip the Bragging: Keep your humblebrags in check. Let your date discover how awesome you are naturally. Just remember, you're not a peacock – no need to fan those feathers.
  4. Life Isn’t a Rom-Com: Despite what Hollywood wants us to believe, standing outside someone's window with a boombox overhead is more likely to get you arrested than a second date. Keep the grand romantic gestures for when you've built a genuine connection.
  5. Be a Mystery… But Not Sherlock Holmes Level: Be intriguing, keep a few secrets up your sleeve for later dates. But remember, too much mystery and your date might end up thinking you're part of a crime syndicate!
  6. Red Flags Are Not Flags at a Bullfight: If you spot a red flag, don't charge at it like a bull; it's not a challenge. Acknowledge it and, if necessary, have a conversation about it.
  7. Don't Be a Puppet Master: Control isn't cool. Your date isn't a puppet, and you're not a puppeteer. So, no strings attached!
  8. No Ghosting or Zombie-ing: If you're not feeling it, be honest. Don't ghost or “zombie” (that's when you ghost and then come back from the dead with a random text at 2 a.m., by the way).
  9. Meet the Parents Only When You're Ready: Don't rush into meeting her folks before you're sure about the relationship. Just remember, the only person more scared than you is probably them!
  10. Drop the Pick-up Lines: Unless you're Ryan Reynolds delivering a hilariously self-aware pick-up line in a rom-com, just be yourself. Authenticity wins hearts, not cheesy lines.
  11. Pet Names Aren't for Day One: Save “sugarplum”, “honey bunny”, and other pet names for when you're actually dating.
  12. Texting Etiquette: Keep your texts balanced. If her last text was a novel, don't reply with a ‘K'. And remember, emojis are fun but they're not a secret language. 😉
  13. Social Media Stalking: Everyone does a little pre-date social media sleuthing. Just remember not to like that photo from 2010 accidentally.
  14. Know When to Fold ‘Em: If the chemistry is as flat as a pancake on a supermodel's plate, it might be time to gracefully exit. Not every date is going to be a winner, and that's okay!
  15. Keep the Adventure Alive: Remember, dating is an adventure, not a chore. Keep it exciting, be spontaneous, and above all, enjoy the ride!

Chill out, be yourself if you're not unbearable, and take things with a grain of salt. It's date, not a job interview. So get out there lad and chat up your nearest lady AI.

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